Ms. Bright has been my colleague for some time now. She has her good qualities, and one of them is knowing precisely which buttons to push with the kids. One of her worst qualities, unfortunately, is knowing which buttons to push with me. I always hate it when people figure me out and announce it to the world.
In our extended-day school, I taught beginning ESL periods nine and ten. Naturally I was in the trailer, and Ms. Bright somehow always found the parking space right outside my door. While I was welcoming the students, she would call out to me.
"Mr. Educator?"
"Yes?"
"I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving now."
"Oh, thank you, Ms. Bright. Thank you very much for letting me know."
"Don't mention it," she'd say.
Then she'd get in her car and start it up. And a moment later, she'd get out and call me again.
"Mr. Educator?"
"Yes, Ms. Bright?"
"I just want to let you know that I'm getting in my car now, and I'm going to drive away and go home."
Then she slammed the door and sped away. Sometimes I wanted to shout, "I get paid more than you," but I somehow knew what her response would be.
"I'm younger and better-looking than you are."
And really, how could I deny that? So I'd just go in and face the kids, who found the entire ritual hilarious. And no matter how many times she did it, they never got tired of it.
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