Tuesday, November 05, 2013

The Trials and Tribulations of Meryl Tisch

Not only is Meryl Tisch chancellor of the NY State Board of Regents, she's also chairwoman of the the Metropolitan Council on Jewish Poverty. Because really, controlling the education of millions of NY State children is kind of a part-time gig. When you're as rich as Meryl Tisch, you need time to play polo, to shoot skeet, to go fox-hunting, and of course you have to run a few charities. It's just what you do.

Naturally, you haven't got time to actually do any work at these jobs, because you're busy. There are gala luncheons and charity balls, there are clothes to have tailored, and vacations to plan. There are homes to redesign and servants to chastise. So you hire people to work for you. But good help is so hard to get nowadays. I mean, here you are paying some character half a million bucks a year to run the charity you're supposed to be in charge of, and he runs off and steals a few million.

And for a few lousy million, the papers are all, "You're incompetent," and "You're irresponsible," and "How can you run a school system if you can't even pay attention to what's going on in your own backyard?" I mean, the audaciousness! Who do these people think they are?

And you're kind to your inferiors. You pay private school tuition for them because, for goodness sakes, those public schools are just awful! And you know, because you run them. The fact is, even criminals who mix in our circles ought not to have to consort with the bootless and unhorsed in those public schools.

And now they criticize you for that as well! These daily periodicals are so vulgar! Why did you get involved in this whole Regents thing anyway? You could be wintering in the south of France! Then you wouldn't have to go to those awful dinners at Governor Andy's house with Sandra Lee cooking Spicy Spam Surprise, and making those awful drinks with the gaudy umbrellas.

You give and give and give, but for goodness sake, there's a limit!
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