Punchy Mike Email October 2019

Hi folks. It's me, your old buddy, "Punchy" Mike Mulgrew. Now I'm damn proud of that moniker, I defended Common Core, and I defended having those tests. Of course the initial rollout was a problem, and the subsequent 9 rollouts have been problems as well. When are those darn bureaucrats gonna roll out this thing the way it should be rolled? I was at Cinnabon yesterday, over at the mall, and those buns were rolled out perfectly. Why can't Governor Cuomo roll out something like that?

Now a lot of people are complaining about the new APPR system. We know that the matrix is the way to go, and despite what our opponents say, we've kept state assessments down to 80% of your evaluation. In Florida it's up to 99%, and we've drawn a line in the sand at 80%. We're good at drawing lines in the sand, because we've been drawing them since way back in 2015 when it was 20%.

So let's get down to the new 3020a system. As you know, at one time the burden of proof was on the DOE to show that you were incompetent. We improved on this by adding UFT dementors evaluators to decide whether or not they needed to prove your incompetence, and they only threw 70% of poorly rated teachers under the bus. This was a great victory, as Governor Cuomo wanted to throw 100% of poorly rated teachers under the bus. Now we all know that, for a period of two years, the governor had actually thrown them under Greyhound buses, but after my strongly worded letter, we were able to initiate the current much-improved system.

Now a lot of people are making a big fuss about teachers being clad as gladiators and fighting lions in Citifield, but as usual, our opponents are engaging in relentless negativity. They fail to consider what would've happened if we had not negotiated it down. Governor Cuomo wanted teachers to fight fire-breathing dragons, and we told them that just crossed a line. We told him we would not stand for it. Remember, we are always smart and tactical, and once we pointed out that fire-breathing dragons do not, in fact, exist, the state dropped that demand.

Now it's true working teachers have not had much luck fighting the lions. But we're holding regular lion-fighting workshops at our borough offices, and we've even build a working stadium at 52 Broadway. We've also found that the lions help to keep out the riff-raff during the Delegate Assemblies, and we've found that most votes are unanimous since we've threatened to uncage them at meetings.

And I know, the ATRs are still bellyaching because they haven't got a chapter. I know a lot of them are upset because they don't want to fight the lions, but we have to stick together and put on a united front. And the good news is that any teacher, ATR or not, who isn't eaten by a lion will get the full final retro payment next October.  Honestly, the opposition demands that people eaten by lions be made whole is simply unreasonable.

Remember that we in UFT leadership are always smart and tactical. Remember that no UFT member has ever faced a fire-breathing dragon, and I give you my most solemn promise that this will not be a feature of the new contract, which, under my leadership, is only one year overdue.