Overheard

Of teachers:

“I could vote for it because I’m going to retire.  But that would go against everything I went on strike for.  I don’t believe in giving all this stuff back.”

“They pretend to pay me, and I pretend I’m working.”

Of students:

“Without my glasses, I can’t even find my glasses.”

“This room smells like math.”

(Upon watching me, her teacher, feign a heart attack over a subject-verb agreement error)
“You needs to calm down, man.”