Thursday, January 26, 2006

Another Modest Proposal


An anonymous commenter and I have finally hit on the ideal solution to the ever-troublesome problem of underfunded education. Why not combine it with a profit-making activity that will soothe those who complain of school taxes? That way everyone will be happy.

We'll combine schools with Wal-Marts. You would still give classes, of course. But while kids are answering questions, instead of pretentiously fiddling with your glasses, you could fold a few sweaters. Perhaps while lecturing about manifest destiny, you could be mopping a spill on aisle 3.

And the kids? Why should they slide? Once they finish the assignment, they could get out of their chairs and help a few customers. We've been very lax in socializing these kids, and what's more valuable than real-world experience? Times are tough, and kids have been riding the gravy train way too long anyway.

We could call them "Sam's Schools," as the anonymous commenter suggests, and increase productivity all around.

Is that a win-win, or is that a win-win?
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